Friday, April 23, 2010

Smashing Brick Walls

Right on the heels of my good news about school, I received some relatively bad news about school. I called to check on the status of my spring/summer loan request and this is the information I received:

"Actually, you've reached your aggregate loan limit for undergraduate studies."

My what? Until Wednesday, I had no prior knowledge of the term "aggregate loan limit," and I certainly had no clue that I was anywhere near reaching mine. NOT GOOD, especially when you're paying for your education and supplementing your family's income (barely getting by I might add) through student loans. Apparently this term was couched (and explained) somewhere in the depths of the multiple pages of financing jargon I was supposed to have read when I signed my promissory note. My bad for simply glossing over all that stuff. Does anyone actually read it all, I wonder?

And the worst part is that no one, not one single person, ever took the time to look at my situation carefully enough to let me know that this was something about which I might have needed to be aware. I've been to counselors and I've stayed in touch. I've played my cards by the book, both academically and financially. My biggest crime is my lack of awareness and expertise about how this system operates. Now, only two short semesters away from the end, I'm receiving the news that my financial safety net is gone.

The bottom line is that where huge, bureaucratic institutions are concerned, you're on your own. You can go to as many counselors as you want but in the end, you're completely and totally on your own to navigate the waters and understand the systems. There is no real support in place for this stuff - half the time you can't even speak to a real human being anymore.

I do get it. I understand why they put limits and ceilings in place. It's to prevent people from repeatedly getting loans that they never intend to repay. But that's not me. Granted, I went about things more than a little backwards where my education is concerned but I'm not a slacker with no ambitions...and I'm certainly not intending to abuse the system in any way. But none of that matters. This is a hard limit, completely black-and-white. There are no provisions in place for someone like me who actually does have a legitimate need to borrow the last little chunk of college money I need. There is no room for someone to fall into a gray area, exactly like the one in which I now find myself. Arghhhhhhh, all of this is SO utterly frustrating!

I know I have to take my fair share of the responsibility for this SNAFU and I'm painfully aware of the fact that I'm the one who now has to suffer the consequences of my lack of awareness regarding my educational loans but still...this smacks pretty hard.

So the long story short is that Michael and I now have to find some way to come up with the requisite ~ $6,000 that I need in order to finish up my last few classes at Eastern and complete my two semesters of Student Teaching. *sigh* I have NO idea what we're going to do and I'm pretty much stressed to the max. Suddenly there's a lovely little brick wall that has obtrusively asserted itself smack in the middle of my path. Ugh.

I feel a little sick.

That being said, I'm not about to let that brick wall stand in my way. I fully intend to either go over the damn thing or smash right through it. Either way, I will finish my degree. I'm currently investigating my options so that I can come up with a plan for how to get enough money. Wish me luck!


Sunday, April 18, 2010

Undergraduate Symposium & Student Teaching - Opportunities Abound!

Well the wheels are beginning to turn a bit faster for me where school is concerned. I'm finally, finally just about done with my course work and ready for student teaching! This is my last mainstream semester (it's been a rough one) and then I have four (or hopefully only three if I get my waiver for speech) classes to take this spring/summer and I'm on my way to student teaching!

I met with my cooperating teacher on Friday and she seems really nice. I'm going to be working with her from September-December of this year so I hope the relationship continues to go well. She teaches first grade in the district that was my first choice so I'm pretty happy about my placement. :) It's going to be a lot of hard, exhausting work for NO pay, which is pretty stressful but I hope it will also be a good experience that will lay the foundation for me to be a strong teacher when I finally get a job.

Speaking of getting a job, I've potentially got another great thing to add to my resume! Last week, a professor asked me to stay after class to see her. Of course I was a tad nervous but it turned out to be a very good thing. Based on some of the work I've done this semester, she wants to nominate me, along with two other students, to take part in the undergraduate symposium at EMU. I still have to gather some information and talk with the other two students to figure out exactly how this all works but I think being nominated is a pretty strong, positive statement. There are usually only 300 presentations per annual school year. With an approximated total student body of 23,000, I must be doing something right. :)

It's so nice to finally be seeing some of my hard work beginning to pay off. For such a long time now I've been in school with a seemingly insurmountable pile of classes and requirements to wade through but now, almost out of nowhere, the end is in sight and is, I think, very much an attainable goal. How thrilling!